hehe :)

that's what my feeling is feeling rite now. i know i know, and u know, i should not.
but after tonite, i realized that there is nothing there... it is confirmed.
but i know that i will say something else hahaha
as long as i hang out with him, things will be like this.
i dont want to stay over niteeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee in niu yorkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk
because that will be 48 hrs with himmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
gawd!!!!!
but too late to pull back now..gotta face it and just get it over with..

horoscope of the day

"You're usually a happy-go-lucky type, and one way to make sure that you stay that way is to do some regularly scheduled maintenance on your soul. Look within yourself. Are there any questions that need answers?"

The last sentence is really interesting. I know the answers but dont know where to start.
One way to start is by starting writing any doubts i have.

ssshh...

U notice that i write my blog more regularly now? that means that either i am bore to death or ....
hahaha i let u decide...
i was studying and my mind was not in the book
i realized that people have secrets.
yes, i/we hang out with them every weekend or after work. chat with them but i feel like i dont know them. and i can bet that they dont know anything about me neither, given that i have problem trusting people hahaha
we usually hang out with 10-15 people in a group. but, i only know 2-3 persons. i mean like i know them. and i call them friends. others are more like acquentances.
Everytime i meet them, we always laugh, joke around. i feel like that it's not real.
2 things,
people tend to cover things up.
and people have secrets.

Crystal Ball

I believe that not knowing the future makes life interesting.
But I really really want to know this time. Because I dont feel like playing a game. But I know that I am powerless because even a lawyer wont be able to give me the answer.

Greatest Feeling

Making your parents proud... instead of headache like me hwuaheuhaha

What's your wish

http://timecapsule.yahoo.com/capsule.php

12.03

i wish that i did not know that he is going away ...
i hide myself for 2 days. no contact whatsoever with him.because work has been crazy, plus i want to see his reaction.
on the 3rd day, i said hi *yes, i was the first one that broke the ice* we talked, and he said, so how are you? we havent chatted for couple days.
then i realized that he was right, it has been couple days. i did not realize it. honestly, i did not realize it at that time.
i know it's nothing but it's nice when people ask how you are doing and they mean it when they ask you.
i try not to have any expectations but everytime i thought i have done it, something always happened and i have to start all over again...
prob. i should not start all over because there is nothing to start with...
just keep going....
and try not to look back

we'll see how i will do next week...:)

Settling Down

ever wonder where you belong?

what a turn

#1.girl likes a guy.
guy showed up with a girl.
girl confused and wait.

#2.guy showed up alone.
girl happy.
guy talked to guy intimately.
guy went home with guy.
girl dont know.
two friends noticed.
assumption: guy is _ _ _
confusion continues...

#3. guy showed up with a girl.
introduced as :this is my girlfriend.
confusion no more.
assumption crushed.
girl dont know yet.

yay!

yay!yay!yayyyyy!!!i am done with my work!!good gawd!!! temen aku kelaur dari kerjaan kemaren ini.. so aku ambil alih kerjaan dia.. u know.. aku suka sama kerjaan dia..thats the one i want.. i have been eye-ing for that position since day one.
hahahaha
soalnya aku suka budgeting...projections things like that...
cuma mumetnya ga ketulungan sehhhh
mumet kalo angka gak matching..holy cow beneran deh...
soalnya we use VPN... so other folks ada access dan mrk bisa edit the file tapi there's no trace who did what..itu yg bikin mumet..
but it's all goood nowww
huwahahahhaha
done with one..thousands more to go!!!:>
iya nih..the last project, aku ga gitu confident kalo angkanya matching.. harus dicek neh..darn..

lala lalala..:>

ha!

this is sad man... now all my blog is about guys..well mainly a guy...one guy... i promised myself that i wont get soak into it..i want to improve my writing by blogging... eitsss i guess my feeling is telling me diff.things :>
u know..it's funny.. i know today he is not gonna say hi to me because he called last nite and according to him, he is returning my call. well..i checked my phone and i dont see his number being dialed out of my phone.. talked for several minutes but he kept saying,,ya im just returning your call..i thought u called me..
hmm why can't 2 ppl chat? when he called, i didnt make a big deal out of it..like..screaming OMG!!he called me!!!
but, anyway,,,i know he is not gonna say hi to me which doesnt surprise me because he wants to put a distance..he doesnt want to give me a wrong impression or signal..
got it dude! but u dont need to keep mentioning it which makes it weird...